In the six months that I have been in California, I have sometimes felt like I’m dating all over again. Only, this time it is to find new friends that will take on the role of family like my friends in Singapore did.
I know we think dating is difficult when you’re trying to find a person to love. Let me tell you that finding a friend who is like a sister is equally difficult.
I would like to be a bigger person than someone who stereotypes an entire population in one sweeping motion, but something about being here makes it difficult. I don’t know if it is my misfortune to have met people who are inevitably self- obsessed or plain bad at listening. (And I know that for those of you who have known me for a long time calling somebody a poor listener is almost a joke, given I’ve become a listener only after lots of feedback from those who love me.)
It’s not all bad. I have got in touch with old friends who live in the area and are wonderful to meet up with or talk to. But by and large, there is something about being here that turns those people into a more narcissistic version of themselves. Each time I think I’m on a good date and that we should meet once again something happens that sends me right back to ground zero.
I don’t mean to sound negative about my new life here. I love a lot of things about living here. The weather, the opportunities to hike and feel one with nature, the food, how accommodating this place is of vegetarians And most of all how happy P is here. His happiness somehow acts as a soothing balm that makes me happy and makes our life much much happier than it was ever before. And really, what a baby i am to be complaining about minor things like this when I have a job that makes me happy and challenges me every single day.
But while this blog is about telling you all of the great stuff that happens in my new life, it is also about being honest about the not so good things that I encounter. And my luck with making new friends aside from a handful is one of those not so good encounters.
P.S. Person on east coast who cooks, Person who hikes every weekend in Cali and P’s PHD friend – if you’re reading this, you are all exceptions to the above.